kids for sale!

I have 3 boys all up for sale! 5yrs, almost 4 and 19months. They are the best boys ever......if your thing is explosive diapers, getting vommed on and back chatting!

Adam- He is the 5yr old. He is very polite when he isn't busy talking back with the "I'm awesome your old get the hell out of my hair" attitude that he has. He will clean is room.....after you have beaten the crap out of him and taken away any upcoming trips that he wants to go on.

Kevin- He is the almost 4yr old. He is super loving when he isn't shrieking cos the T.V turned on a second to late or the dog licked his big toe and not his little toe. He has this angelic little voice that you may get to hear once a month because he is usually whining.

Ryan- He is the 19month old. He is very smart. Though not smart enough to leave his diaper on so shit doesn't decorate his room. He loves the smell of his own arse I'm positive of that one. I mean he has to be right? He is the only kid I know that will crap all over himself (head to toe) his bed and the carpet and still sit and play like nothing has happened.

I will give you all 3 kids for a great price. They come with toys, furniture, clothes, diaper, wipes, car seats, stroller AND I will even give you $20 if you can get here in the next hour :)

Oh and if you like the word radical then you get an extra $10 (which I would put toward your therapy bill cos trust me your gonna need it after having my oh so wonderful, caring, stunning looking devil spawn children!!!


Now I'm going to open a bottle of bud (what its 2pm in England its totally OK!) and eat my ferrero rocher. (no not the ones shoved down my kids undies. The one's my wonderful friend Mayra got me)
If anyone needs me I will be checking into the looney bin in a couple hours. Feel free to come visit!